The more I travel across this country – and abroad for that matter – the more I am dumbfounded by the human ability to choose just one place to call home.
There are a hundred magical villages, towns, cities and regions that strike a frisson of excitement in my gut, triggering the feeling that “I could live here.” They include: almost anywhere on Vancouver Island; the Gulf Islands; the Cariboo; Crowsnest Pass; the Kootenays; Banff; Revelstoke; Crescent Beach; Montreal; Quebec City; L’Isle D’Orleans; Cape Breton; Chelsea; Haida Gwaii; Grasslands; the Qu’Appelle Valley; Manitoulin Island; Queen Street West; the north shore of Lake Superior; Wolfe Island; and Toronto Island. And I still haven’t seen the Far North, Newfoundland and much of Quebec.
So for that guy who proudly, loudly and frequently proclaims to me “I live in the best place on earth!” I’m glad you’re thrilled. It’s good to be satisfied with what you have. But I am very familiar with where you live and I have to ask: “Are you kidding? Have you taken a good, hard look around? You’ve managed to scour the earth, conduct a thorough, systematic comparison based on a variety of factors, narrow it down to one place, and actually pick up and move there by choice? Really??”
I think it’s human nature to want to justify our choices, to make ourselves feel good about the path we’ve actively chosen or the life we’ve passively fallen into. But I find his declaration weirdly competitive, divisive and smug, not to mention conversation-crushing. The reality is we are likely to live where we live because of cheap land and taxes, safety concerns, family ties, and employment opportunities, making decisions on a fairly narrow set of criteria which are listed here and here. And I suspect fear – of change, of the unknown – is an enormous driver around whether we stay put or push off.
I think daydreaming of other places to live is about being open to the spectacular creation around us – call it God-given or otherwise – and having the courage to try other options on for size. I think it’s about challenging complacency and assessing whether our choice of where we live, which significantly contributes to our personal narrative, still matches our value set. It’s about smashing the “have to’s” and “musts” and seeing what other kinds of happiness, life-experience, and growth fall out.
After 14 years in Ottawa I am frequently asked “Don’t you miss Vancouver?” No, I don’t. I miss my friends and family, and I recognize the opportunity costs of not being there, but I don’t pine for the place. It’s not me anymore.
And I don’t believe there is a “Best Place on Earth.” There is just the place I live – by choice or circumstance – until I no longer do.